March 22, 2017.
Dear Anuli of the Past,
I am unhappy. Unhappy with the fact that you let your insecurities get to you so much so that you became too conscious of what people say or think about you, or what people see when they look at you. I apologize for starting on a negative note, but I had to let that out.
I love you, there is no doubt about that, but I fear that the lack of love at the start contributed to the inferiority you felt and sometimes still feel. I am very sorry but I assure you, despite the black dots in this love, there is a lot of white.
I apologize for letting you seek comfort in the things that we are paying for today. I am the older of us two and it was my responsibility to look after us. I am sorry i neglected my responsibilities.
I want to let you know that you should never have mentioned that mom couldn’t buy you things, yes, you were young and ignorant, but you still paid for it. I want you to know that mom can buy you anything and everything you want, but do you really need them? I promise that she is saving, for your/our rainy day.
I am very glad that you didn’t see writing stories and acting plays with your imaginary friends as lame, because you have shaped my life greatly now. I promise I am still doing all of that, and just like you, I do not see it as lame, but creative.
I am doing very well and you would never believe that we have a blog now and awesome supporters who made our little dreams/goals/plans grow so big. They are truly awesome, I wish you could meet them.
I am still reading a lot, and it is so much fun now, all because you made sure of it by always seeking books in every corner.
We lost half of the friends we grew up with because I got too used to being buried deep in a book and forgetting to socialize with those who were once a part of my life. I think it is too late for some relationships to be rebuilt but I promise I am working on the one’s I can.
I started with God late but I don’t regret it because I believe everything happens for a reason. Yes, I wish I could have begun early, but I have long accepted it. Yes, you made Him your center then, but the truth is, every child born into a Christian home starts with God but most times, leaves when they see the world. I am glad I didn’t go too far and that is also thanks to you for building a foundation.
I am happy and content with where we are, I have learnt to cultivate the attitude of gratitude and see the goodness in life. It is a healthy habit, believe me and I am loving it. I love where I am and I always look for growth. I know now that I am destined for greatness, even though you tried telling me countless times.
Thank you for being an adorable little girl because the first impressions you gave are still building your reputation.
I have so much to say but unfortunately I cant say it all. I love you from the bottom of my heart.
Anuli of the Present.
Thanks for stopping by